We're back!

Finally, almost two weeks after we got back, I have the energy to write about our trip. This time, it has been much harder to return to "life as usual" and compartmentalize our grief over being apart from our son. I wake up thinking of him, think about him most of the day, and fall asleep dreaming of him. I am obsessed with checking my email and phone- hoping for good news that his file is out of IBESR, although I know it is unlikely. Just before we left for Haiti, we got word that we will likely be referred for something called a Presidential Dispensation (pardon) for the age requirement (officially 35-50 years old for adoptive parents). This requirement has largely been waived in recent years but the new Director of IBESR has reinstated this stage, adding unknown months to the process. We are trying to prepare ourselves for the reality that he will not be home in 2009. We had hoped this last visit was our last "visit" and that our next trip to Haiti would be to bring him home. For more information about the process and what is happening with Haiti adoptions, check out http://allforchildrenhaiti.blogspot.com/2009/05/haitian-adoption-process.html About the trip... It was, of course, amazing to be with him again! Stanley has grown (although not as much as we expected) and seems to be doing well. He was sick for the first day or two we were there and I began to panic that he was sick and noone was there to take care of him. We started to wonder if that is why is was so skinny and if he hadn't gotten markedly better by the time we left, I am sure I would be a basketcase right now! He did get better and his little personality came right back! He is trying to walk and is still a great snuggler!!! We've added some pictures and videos to the blog so you can check it out for yourself... Traveling to Haiti is always an adventure and this time, we got to ride in a pink bus tricked out with portraits of jesus, a small charter plane and a tap tap (which is basically a pickup truck with people jammed into the back. They call it a "tap tap" because you can tap the sides to get on and off when traveling in the cities. When we arrived at the orphanage, Stanley was a little unsure of us and we spent a few hours just holding him and letting him get used to us again. Although we had been cautioned that he may not feel comfortable coming back to the hotel with us again, we did bring him back with us and it was there where we knew he felt at home. He LOVES sleeping with his daddy and I snapped lots of photos of the two of them sound asleep in our dinky little hotel room. Speaking of hotel rooms... ours was much smaller than our last trip and this time without a fridge, with a faulty light switch and an easily clogged toilet. We spent the first day at the orphanage and watched as families reunited or met their children for the first time. The whole day seemed surreal because we were less overwhelmed at the conditions, less devastated by the sight of the families we met who were dropping off their children at the orphanage, but our hearts ached more because we knew how hard leaving was going to be.